Around five hours to go.
This time around, the community management has organized a year-end party, well, right outside my house. So whether I like it or not, today is going to be a long night.
I hear Kylie Minogue (the DJ must be quite old I must admit) screaming her lungs out from the huge speakers much within earshot, I see people gathering around, free popcorn and candy, smiles and dancing, celebrations beginning…I feel it is an apt time to get some me time. Right in the middle of the melee, for the eye of the storm is where it may be eerily quieter than the outside. My thoughts flow…
How was 2024? Well, fast, for one. Business-wise, we did great, more than doubled our team, lots of new faces, new clients, good results there. Personally, could have done much better on the health front, and that remains a strong area of focus for 2025. I shifted into my house and also built my library, so yes, major tick mark. The rest just sped by.
How useful are these reflections really? Do they serve any meaningful purpose? Are my markers pulled out on 31st Dec, only to be hidden away till the next? Do I consciously set goals and work towards them year on year? Do I have that discipline yet?
I don’t know. Sometimes, I feel its best to take it as it comes, other times, I feel careful planning is essential. But life cannot be planned now can it? Too many variables.
Maybe I can plan my outlook towards it, and its happenings, more than the events themselves. Am I being the best version of myself, fulfilling my immense potential, or am I tending towards procrastination at the earliest given opportunity?
If I go by LinkedIn, everyone is living their life with “lessons learned” every single day. But no, I am not answerable to any of my connections. Nor to my colleagues, nor friends, not even family.
I am answerable to myself. Coz you can lie to the whole world, but not to yourself.
So save the lies for LinkedIn. The truth is, I am still far away from what I can be.
I did mention ‘immense’ potential earlier, not from the point of being narcissist – everyone has immense potential, only some recognize it and a smaller subset realize it.
Everyone comes with a blank slate, and leaves with a blank state – no, your achievements fade away with time – unless you are Newton or Einstein or someone similar, which again, taken a long-enough time scale, will be soon forgotten.
So why bother?
I don’t know. I feel that we have been given this life for a purpose, and that purpose is to recognize who we are, to so as much as we can to discover life, to live it, rather than go through it. Achievements are part of it, but so many people go through life, and go through it well, without achieving anything substantial. I cannot comment on those people. I can only comment on me. I know my potential, I know I can make a difference, now all I have to do is journey towards realization.
Can I improve upon myself every single day, even if it is incremental? Yes, I can. Reading is an excellent tool to help you make small and quantifiable improvements on a daily basis, so is exercise. Discovery of knowledge is what keeps me excited and interested, so I have to hyper focus on it. Not as a machine, no, more from a point of channeling my energies towards being the best I can be. Not in a race, that is competition. This is completion.
No one goes through life in one linear upward trending fashion. Nor does life allow you to go that way. There are plateaus, and drops and highs, and our outlook helps smoothen the curve. So maybe in 2025, I should focus on my outlook towards whatever I do, and how I do it. The way always trumps the result, and the learning lies there. The result is the culmination, good or bad, and is not in your hands. How you go about it however, is. So maybe I should reclaim that bit once again.
Life is a constant recalibration – that is called learning through experience. I am 47 and a bit, soon to be 50. That’s half a century of me here in this world – what do I have to show for it? More importantly, do I have to give a report card of sorts to anyone in the first place?
Yes I do. That someone is myself.
Wish you a happy Gregorian New Year 2025. Don’t make any resolutions, since they are bound to fail, at least surveys say so. Instead, reflect on how you can work towards a better and improved you, one that does not require external validation, but only internal peace.
ॐ असतो मा सद्गमय।तमसो मा ज्योतिर्गमय।मृत्योर्मामृतं गमय ॥
ॐ शान्ति शान्ति शान्तिः ॥
बृहदारण्यकोपनिषद् 1.3.28।
asato mā sadgamaya, tamaso mā jyotirgamaya, mṛtyormāmṛtaṃ gamaya
Lead us from ignorance to knowledge, from darkness to light, from death to immortality.
See you tomorrow!