It’s been a year.
I started to write (regularly) a year back.
The lockdown had been declared and I found myself an extra hour everyday, that I did not want to waste.
And so I started to write.
I didn’t have a plan. I didn’t know what I would write, for how long I would write…nothing. Just put fingers to keyboard and started to type.
The result was a 5-day sādhanā, which got extended to 7 days, and then 21 days.
I followed it up with the exercises for the 21 days.
Then wrote about a few sayings, and then moved on to the Panchatantra. All five tantras.
The Navrātri series – commentary on the Devi Mahātyayam.
The Tirukkural series.
And now the Vetālpanchavimshati series.
All this in a single year.
To think of it, if I had the discipline earlier…at least 20 years of writings?
Yes, maybe I would search for subjects, but then, I am sure I would be able to find them. Like I did this year.
I didn’t miss a single day, not when I was sick, not when I was so busy that I worked till late night, not even when I was in hospital for three days when our son was born.
This is true discipline, and I am happy that I was able to adhere to it.
Now the big question – can I continue to adhere to it?
It is difficult, managing six companies, household obligations, and this as well. But then, I will do it.
One can always search for excuses, or one can just get down and get it done. And this is not a task. This is expression. This is discovery. This is learning.
जिज्ञासा – Jijñāsā – is the ‘desire to know’ in Sanātana Dharma. When the jijñāsā or the desire to know the true nature of anything intensifies, then one reaches the threshold of jñāna or knowledge about those very subjects.
The desire to know is called the sādhya-sādhanā, the desire to know is the very base of knowledge which is an excited state that leads to understanding (paroksha jñāna) which is the beginning point of deeper knowledge (aproksha jñāna).
It is my desire to know, and so I read, and so I write. This is what drives me, and this is what will keep driving me.
And so today, I reiterate my commitment to writing every single day, to continue this practice, and in the course of it, to discover a facet of my self. I may not sell a book, I may not be read widely, but I don’t aim for that.
I aim to satisfy by Jijñāsā, and that is enough motivation to last me a lifetime:)
पारोक्षेण विबुध्येन्द्रो य आत्मेत्यादिलक्षणात् |अप्रोक्षीकर्तुमिच्छंश्चतुर्वारं गुरुं ययौ ||
Indra acquired indirect knowledge of the ultimate reality, by studying Its attributes. He then went to his guru four times with a view to gaining direct knowledge of the self.
Pada VII.67 from the Panchadasi , by Vidyaranya
The knowledge of the self has its culmination in anubhava, which is direct experience or realisation, and in the matter of Brhama-jijñāsā, śruti alone is not the pramāna, or instrument of knowledge. Both śruti and anubhava combined are the pramāna.